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Zozobra

by HappyHappy

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harderwinshears
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harderwinshears Instant classic! Blew my mind and introduced me to HappyHappy, for which I will be ever grateful. I love the songwriting, the music, everything about it. These are the songs I wanted to hear. Favorite track: Overreaction.
the door is the way
the door is the way thumbnail
the door is the way When I first heard this album, it hit me like a truck, it was amazing. And unlike other albums, which decrease in emotional impact the more you listen to them, this one doesn’t. I play it at least once a day with no signs of stopping. Favorite track: UV Blue.
juguchan
juguchan thumbnail
juguchan An amazing album, I put it on and before I know it it's over and I'm starting it again. There's so many layers to each song that I don't think I could ever get bored of sitting down and analysing each song this album. Favorite track: Zozobra.
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1.
Overreaction 05:13
well it started off bad then it got a little better then it got a lot worse then it got so much worse than before you said I should take my medication antipsychotics and stop drinking now I feel grand I feel numb I’m feeling feelings I’m feeling love and I’m sorry about your grandpa I wish there was more that I could do and I know your family’s fucked up but man my family’s fucked up too it’s one thing to feel uncomfortable it’s another to hate the blood in your veins it’s one thing to get disowned it’s another to change your name and I’m sorry that it took me so long to finally understand that the feelings you were feeling made you feel oh ho so bad there's no such thing as an overreaction it’s just a very strong reaction I feel I very strongly react in almost every situation and I wish that I didn’t well I started off good then I started to slip up in fact I’m slipping up right now sitting in my bathroom with a beer bottle in my mouth now I feel grand I feel violent and overwhelmed watch me try and take care of other people I can’t even take care of myself and I’m sorry about your grandpa I wish there was more that I could do and I know your family’s fucked up but man my family’s fucked up too it’s one thing to feel uncomfortable it’s another to hate the blood in your veins it’s one thing to get disowned it’s another to change your name and I’m sorry that it took me so long to finally understand that the feelings you were feeling made you feel oh ho so bad there's no such thing as an overreaction it’s just a very strong reaction I feel I very strongly react in almost every situation and I wish that I didn’t but maybe one day I’ll be at sundance wearing shoes without shoelaces 24 hour surveillance I hope my friends all come and visit me but maybe one day I'll be at sundance wearing shoes without shoelaces 24 hour surveillance I hope my friends all come and visit me I’m not an empathetic person but I wish that I was I spend 3 years at college trying to prove I could feel something but numb and I’m sorry about your grandpa I wish there was more that I could do and I know your family’s fucked up but man my family’s fucked up too it’s one thing to feel uncomfortable it’s another to hate the blood in your veins it’s one thing to get disowned it’s another to change your name and I’m sorry that it took me so long to finally understand that the feelings you were feeling made you feel oh ho so bad there's no such thing as an overreaction it’s just a very strong reaction I feel I very strongly react in almost every situation and I wish that I didn’t
2.
Mouthwash 02:15
sitting on the corner of canyon lake and mountain view using a 40 as mouthwash I was inhaling malt liquor like it was a blood transfusion and I had suffered some blood loss it was the worst day ever just like every other day I was crying for help in the parking lot of a subway too drunk to drive to sober to call you too late in the game to think all of these things through so I’ll wake up and you’ll go back to sleep I’ll try and think of one really cool thing I did today so by the time that you get home I won’t have to tell you all I really did was just get drunk and play video games it was the worst day ever just like every day before I was naked and crying on the living room floor too drunk to stand too sober to call you too late in the game to think all of these things through well that fucking sucks and I know it feels bad just give it a little time it’ll start to feel like a better kind of sad the kind you can drink through or the kind that you forget when you get stoned the kind that makes you really good at video games and staying home alone with your thoughts as you’re going to sleep on your parents couch leaving tear stains on their sheets sitting on the corner of canyon lake and mountain view using a 40 as mouthwash
3.
Jesus Christ 05:26
well I’m the son of god I am jesus christ no wait I’m michael cera I am a mcdonald's sprite and I am filled to the brim with rage and I’m not coming down unless you’re taking me with you I am a zoloft ad I am a bowie knife I am my friends first car I am his iphone 5 and I am riddled with glitches I am malfunctioning I am broken past repair then you ask how I am doing and you said you would do your best to be there I knew I never should have believed you but if I show you my scars will you show me your scars I know yours will look much worse because scars look worse when they’re new and you remind me of haley in the very worst way I remember sitting in our band uniforms at the back of the hallway that’s when you said we were gods we were titans we were mob bosses we were oh so very violent and we said no one can hurt me because I’ve hurt myself any stone you want to throw is a stone I’ve already felt anyway anyway well I’m the son of sam I think I’m going to kill you both I am a bed bath and beyond I am a couple bullet holes away from telling you the things that I wish I had never felt you were holding back your tears while I was holding back the crowds and you were made of wax and you stood too close to me you found out that I really really like to burn things and I am your savior for not destroying you then and there we were gods we were titans we were mob bosses we were oh so very violent and we said no one can hurt me because I’ve hurt myself any stone you want to throw is a stone that I’ve already felt anyway anyway I wanted you to feel better wanted me to feel better too found out you were psycho found out I was psycho 2 but you were the hitchcock and I was the other guy I was anthony perkins you were vera miles and you said you would do your best to be there I knew I never should have believed you but if I show you my scars will you show me your scars I know yours will look much worse because scars look worse when they’re new and you remind me of haley in the very worst way I remember sitting in our band uniforms at the back of the hallway and that’s when you said we were gods we were titans we were mob bosses we were oh so very violent and we said no one can hurt me because I hurt myself any stone you want to throw is a stone that I’ve already felt we were gods we were titans we were mob bosses we were oh so very violent and we said no one can hurt me because I hurt myself any stone you want to throw is a stone that I’ve already felt anyway anyway
4.
Cream Cheese 03:33
it’s sunday morning I’ve got my shoes on I’m doing dishes I’m getting drunk I got a story I’d love to tell you but I don’t think that you want to talk and I’ve been thinking a lot about my first few years I’ve been thinking a lot about dying how you were learning manual in your dad’s old jeep how you almost killed us at the crossroads of country club and walnut creek and I got a lot of things to say to you you got a lot to say to me I wonder how long it’ll take before you spit out what you’re choking on and I hope you buy a house and it’s a good house hope when you have kids that they are good kids I hope you open a little bagel shop that only serves good bagels and cream cheese it’s monday morning I got my shoes on I’m doing laundry I’m getting drunk sent you a letter and I know you got it but I don’t think that you give a fuck and you said hey I just got this I know it’s been two years been really busy just got married and he’s got a real good job he takes me to disneyland almost every christmas I don’t think that you could ever pull that off and you got a lot of things to say to me I got a lot to say to you because you look happy I hope I look happy too well I hope you get a job and it’s a good job hope you quit that job and get a better job I hope your mom still makes really good jalapeno poppers like she did that thanksgiving with cream cheese I’ve had a hard time picking up the pieces when something like this breaks it’s going to take a long time to fix it I’ve had a hard time picking up the pieces when something like this breaks it’s going to take a long time to fix it and I hope you buy a house and it’s a good house hope when you have kids that they are good kids I hope you open a little bagel shop that only serves good bagels with cream cheese
5.
NPR 04:03
I love you like npr loves the postal service brandon loves your face I love you like I loved going to subway every wednesday and I love you like dylan loved his drugs before he disappeared I love you like katie loved austin and austin loved someone else who died in a car crash last year and I love you like jessica loves her kids and justin loves his god I love you like most people loved their parents before their parents broke up and I love you like you love yourself because you are strong when I am weak I’ll play the medic this time I’ll be the support that you need but I got my back to the wall and my feet on the ground I am listening to sad songs way too loud and I’ll send everyone I know some cryptic shit that sounds vaguely suicidal something about how worthless I think that I am but I don’t deserve your love I’m going to take it anyway and every time I think about it I think that something is going to change I love you like I love torturing myself and I love being angry I love you like I hate my depression but I love the songs it gives me I love you like I love eating lemons both the sour and the sweet I love you like I love horror movies and you love it when I scream and I love you like jessica loved allie though she never said a thing and now they’re getting married and I hope I can make it to their wedding and I love you like chloe loves the world I wish I could see it through her eyes she’s taking pictures of the sunset saying hey look at this one isn't this one nice but I got my back to the wall and my feet on the ground and I am listening to sad songs way too loud and I’ll send everyone I know a cryptic text tells them how much I love them I know they’ll probably ignore it but I don’t deserve your love I’m going to take it anyway and every time I think about it I think that something is going to change but I don’t deserve your love I’m going to take it anyway and every time I think about it I think that something is going to change
6.
UV Blue 03:28
you asked susan larsen if I ever told the truth I am a liar and you know it but why would I lie to susan that’s like lying to myself that’s like pushing all my feelings down that’s something I am good at but I’m not doing it now and all my dreams are things that I don’t like my teeth fall out my sisters die my dad is standing here and he is crying and all I do is stare at him I feel my feet start shuffling away to a safer place and I am running I am faster in my dreams I am listening to journey I have nikes on my feet and I am faster than usain bolt quicker than I was in middle school but so is everything that is trying to kill me and I saw what you posted a couple hours ago what would have ruined my day just made me turn off my phone and I got problems but you knew this you knew well before I knew I was getting slapped by tara after a shot of uv blue and that reminds me of the party when everyone cried I was sitting in the corner I was way too high to comprehend that this is fleeting and everything ends I was sitting on my roof just read kurt vonnegut and so it goes and it never fucking stops someone stop this ride because I want to get off because I’m too scared of heights and that sinking feeling in you fall and I am falling oh god I’m falling it’s a sadness I can’t shake it’s a feeling in my stomach it’s a habit I can’t break and not knowing if you’re in trouble it’s a sadness I can’t shake it’s a feeling in my stomach it’s a habit I can’t break and not knowing if you’re in trouble or if you are all alone but I heard somebody died out on i-40 west I hope it wasn’t you or anyone else from college I heard some somebody died out on i-40 west I hope it wasn’t you or anyone else from college it’s a sadness I can’t shake it’s a feeling in my stomach it’s a habit I can’t break and not knowing if you’re in trouble or if you are all alone
7.
you’re the secret stash of karkov I keep in my backpack you’re the bumming cigarettes whenever I’m too stressed you’re the unmistakable feeling that something has and will go wrong you’re the puking in the bathroom the worst part of drinking you’re the bowl I’m going to finish even though I’ve stopped breathing you’re the facebook post I just saw about how someone died from cancer and you know me and all of my problems how I’ll never get sober by the time I finish driving home I’ll be a the legal limit or over but you are the brave little toaster and I’m just a regular toaster you had found out all the answers and I was copying them over your shoulder just like lindsey collins in sophomore english I’ll make everyone really upset when they find out what’s going on when they discover my diabolical plan but I’m not a big man I am a coward you are the best thing and I am a liar
8.
Amoeba 03:24
I became an amoeba tiny version of me I started spawning some new ones until I’d created an army I taught them how to be violent and how to be lonely I gave them bottom shelf liquor and I told them to keep drinking I sent them all off to college to make their own money they all came crawling back home they were bitter and angry so we created a virus got everyone coughing made all their livers shut down while ours were expanding now you can’t ignore me whenever I call I am your god I’ll take your prayers whenever I want and you were saying you were fine we all knew it wasn’t true they were checking your id for an organ donor sticker by the time that you’d walked through the door to the hospital you were bleeding out and they said that it looked critical and I remembered my seventh grade birthday how happy I must have felt and I don’t think I ever remember feeling that happy about anything else because there is poison in the water there are bubbles in my blood I have ten minutes left to live before my heart is going to pop now you can’t ignore me whenever I call I am your god I’ll take your prayers whenever I want and I was saying I was fine but we all knew it wasn’t true they were checking my id for an organ donor sticker by the time that I’d walked through the doors to the hospital I was bleeding out and they said that I looked stable for now and I wanted you see how bad this really is a physical manifestation of what I did they gave me a turkey sandwich kept me overnight I could hear the guy on the other side of the curtain start to die now you can’t ignore me whenever I call I am your god I’ll take your prayers whenever I want
9.
Panic Attack 03:26
I wonder just how little talking I can get away with before you figure something’s wrong and try your best to fix it but I’m really good at pushing people really good at shoving matches I will skin my palms and knees and wipe the blood right off of my hands so you never get the chance to because I will have beaten you to it you say that all your friends are vampires well honey I can prove it but I’m turning off my phone there’s use looking back I’ll play video games until I have a panic attack woah oh I wonder just how little talking you can get away with before I realize something’s wrong and completely ignore it but you’re really good at pushing people really good at shoving matches you will draw blood and I’ll get stitches in my head as I think about local anesthesia how nice it would have been if I could have numbed all of my fingers so I couldn’t respond to what you said but I’m turning off my phone there’s use looking back I’ll play video games until I have a panic attack woah oh you told me not to do this but here I am I got a flask in one pocket and the bottle in my hand and I’m upset I’m angry I’m way too mad you were sitting under a tree when I refused to say I love you back and I know that it’s not what you planned or what you thought would happen you were wrong anyways I’m turning off my phone
10.
it’s the ending of adventureland that makes me feel this way I’m watching jesse eisenberg and kristen stewart kissing in the rain it feels like open fifths meet the robinsons you know that final scene where the sad sappy shitty song starts playing but the ending is happy and it’s this open kind of sadness that makes me feel so alone I’ll be your jesse eisenberg you could be my american ultra never speaking always waiting always stuck in the background but never fading and it feels like leaving I know you’ve felt that before it feels like hugging my walls eating a spongebob shaped ice cream bar and dying but way too slow it feels like graduation or my funeral but it’s this open kind of sadness that makes me feel so ashamed I’ll be your kristen stewart and you could help plan my escape but always planning and never acting on the plan we’ll go over detail after the fact and you said that you were waiting you never told me where you were you said that’s a mountain goats line but you think that it applies here and I agree like the setting of the sun you never know when it’s happening but when it does you lose your love and it’s this open kind of sadness that makes me feel so alone I’ll be you jesse eisenberg you could be my american ultra and it’s this open kind of sadness that makes me feel so alone I’ll be you jesse eisenberg you could be my american ultra and it’s this open kind of sadness that makes me feel so alone I’ll be you jesse eisenberg you could be my american ultra and it’s this open kind of sadness that makes me feel so alone I’ll be you jesse eisenberg you could be my american ultra
11.
Zozobra 07:07
you wanted honesty I wanted it more you wanted doctor phil I gave you frankenfurter with golden underwear and flashy show tunes if I knew what was wrong with me I’d tell you it’s always you versus me it’s always us versus them that’s the only way I can ever get my brain to comprehend that I am not as worthless as I think that I am my self destructive habits fold when they realize I have been the zozobra and that means I’m specialer than you that means I’m all that in a bag of chips these salt and vinegar wounds are healing now but they don’t feel like it and me in all of my glory my hipster beat up t shirts the fifty foot tall effigy you burned well I hope you wrote my name down I hope you stuck it deep inside watched it burn with everything else everyone wanted to watch die you were the one who got underneath the fact and the fiction found what’s in between the smile that you’re faking and your pearly white teeth it’s the feeling that feels like nothing is real but I can feel it crawling up through my neck it’s the very worst feeling whenever it reaches my head it feels like I did a lot of drugs even though I know I didn’t it feels like I’m going to die the anxiety is kicking in but that means I’m specialer than you that means I’m all that in a bag of chips these salt and vinegar wounds are healing now but they don’t feel like it and me in all of my glory my hipster beat up t shirts the fifty foot tall effigy you burned well I hope you wrote my name down I hope you stuck it deep inside watched it burn with everything else everyone wanted to watch die I am your anxieties I am your whole life destroy me all that you want I’ll see you next time I am your brother I am his bad habits I do the things that he does I disappear for a month I am your anxieties I am your whole life destroy me all that you want I’ll see you next time I am your brother I am his bad habits I do the things that he does I disappear for a month I am your anxieties I am your whole life destroy me all that you want I’ll see you next time I am your brother I am his bad habits I do the things that he does I disappear for a month you’re going to burn me you’re going to turn me to ash cover me in kerosene and send pictures to your dad you’re going to hurt me you’re going to hurt me bad I’m going to cry you’re going to laugh I am your anxieties I am your whole life destroy me all that you want I’ll see you next time I am your brother I am his bad habits I do the things that he does I disappear for a month I am your anxieties I am your whole life destroy me all that you want I’ll see you next time I am your brother I am his bad habits I do the things that he does I disappear for a month and me in all of my glory my hipster beat up t shirts the fifty foot tall effigy you burned well I hope you wrote my name down I hope you stuck it deep inside watched it burn with everything else everyone wanted to watch die but some things that are broken deserve to be broken some things that are burned deserve to be burned some people that don’t fit in will never fit in some things that I’ve learned deserve to be unlearned

credits

released May 17, 2019

Daymon Ryan - acoustic guitar, vocals, trumpet, synthesizers
Makena Janis - drums, viola, bass guitar, electric guitar
Tim Jones - Cello
Brian Malik (Chrundle the Great) - gang vocals

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HappyHappy Indianapolis, Indiana

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